Have you ever woke up one morning to begin your week on a Monday and the next thing you know you blinked only to discover it was Friday evening already? Along the way you may have given the bird to the person driving so slowly you couldn’t make it to work on time, discovered you were wearing part of your lunch from scarfing down something that resembled food while running down the hallway to your next appointment, found makeup just a little out of place because the car mirror you were using on your commute wasn’t ideal for the task at hand, or realized at the end of the day your socks didn’t match (I’m not sure socks matching even count because this is a non-essential laundry task to some of us). Life is as crazy, hectic busy as we choose to allow it to be. I have always struggled to find balance between all of the wonderful, fantastic hobbies I want to partake in along with all of the lackluster, dreadful obligations I say yes to doing. If only I had a dollar for every time I said I didn’t have enough time in the day…
There are 168 hours, 10,080 minutes, and 604,800 seconds in a week (give or take a few seconds because math is hard). If we spend our time wisely we can achieve an awful lot in one week. In this fast paced world it seems inherent to find more things than can be feasibly done in those 604,800 seconds, leaving us chaotically scrambling from one thing to the next on repeat. I have been the queen of over-commit most of my life. I can recount wearing a few lunches, running to court in the most uncomfortable dress shoes so I didn’t miss a hearing, or feeling incredibly rude when I couldn’t spare a few minutes for someone who needed my attention. I would regularly decline invitations to things I would really want to do with the reason “I would love to but I just don’t have enough time.”
One day I was asked about my priorities. I quickly rattled off my list in the following order: family, friends, working out, personal development, volunteer work, career, and hobbies. Then the “aha” exercise was given. I was directed to account for all of the things I choose to do for a week and how much time I devoted to each task. I needed to account for all 168 hours of my week to include the time I spent sleeping. The results were humbling and alarming. Work was consuming the majority of my time (well over 40 hours per week). Working out was my second biggest time allocation aside from sleep. The things I had said were most important, family and friends, were pretty far down the time allocation list even though they were at the top of my priority list. Things which weren’t even on my list of priorities were taking up a moderate chunk of my time. The discrepancy between how I was choosing to spend my time and what I identified as priorities was stark. I did what any logical twenty-something would do: I quit my job and moved back in with my parents so I could get all the family time and priority alignment my heart could handle. I’m lying. I didn’t do that.
Another suggestion was to decline opportunities by stating “that isn’t a priority to me today”. At first it felt foreign, funny, awkward, and uncomfortable, but it empowered me to own who I truly am and what I truly value. Want to know what the other invaluable side effect of owning your priorities is? It can instantly displace any guilt or disappointment you might feel about things you miss out doing. There was an event today which I really value attending. I wasn’t able to make it because I helped someone important to me, and I chose to write this blog. When I was first faced with the realization of needing to opt out one of the things I wanted to do today I was really disappointed. But fear not, my over analytical brain kicked in to save the day from a major guilt fest with a side of poor pitiful me. Instead of attending the event, I helped someone who has dropped everything at any time when I have been the damsel in distress. It filled my soul to be the one giving back this time. Blogging is important to me as well, work is unavoidable, and I chose to not workout to make extra time for the other important things I wanted to achieve. I easily realized, while the other event is a priority to me, it wasn’t my priority today. In processing through the choice I felt affirmed that I was being true to myself, putting my money where my mouth is when telling others they are a priority, and refraining from running around frazzled with unmatched socks, food on my shirt, mud on my pants, eye liner running down my cheek while being uncertain of if I’m coming or going in a frantic haste while only sleeping for two hours every night. What’s there to feel bad about again?
Thanks for stopping by!
Peace & Love
Janessa