When Growth Reveals Itself

Hi friends!  This week I am going to share with you the story of Christmas 2018 because I feel it beautifully embodies the growth I have made in my thinking this year.  Christmas morning began a little off the intended plan.  I had set my alarm to wake early, workout, join my family for church, assist mom with making food, and just enjoy the entire day with family.  Unfortunately I was super congested Christmas Eve which ended up disrupting my sleep for the night.  I was awake well before my alarm and shut it off as to not disturb anyone else.  Somehow I managed to do something I never ever do once awake…I fell back asleep.  No one woke me up and I aroused from my slumber a mere 10 minutes before my family returned home from church.  However, returning to sleep might have been the best thing to happen to me because prior to doing so I was seriously questioning if I was going to end up spending the day with family or just staying at my parents instead.  Upon awaking for the second time on Christmas morning I felt better than before and decided I would dive into the day with all of the energy and joy I could muster. 

Since Kivah (my loyal, sweet, loving dog who I am utterly enamored with) was going to be left alone for the day I decided to squeeze in some exercise with her before getting ready to go to my uncle’s house.  Just so we’re on the same page, “exercise” on Christmas morning looked like Kivah mushing as hard as she could on the most successful dog sledding team to ever dog sled, but I had no sled. Or snow.  While Kivah was having the time of her life, my arm was fully extended with my short little legs moving as swiftly as they possibly could in an attempt to keep up (picture cartoon animation character with their legs spinning in a circle so fast they are nothing but a blur).  Every other block this ever so enthusiastic pup would glance back at me with her eyes pleading “Can you please detach the anchor that you are now?!”  The one person who drove passed us in the small town of 400 people slowed nearly to a stop to smile, stare, and take in the ridiculously hysterical athletic adventure.  In total, we managed 1.5 miles of something reminiscent to intervals (Kivah’s need to alleviate herself saved my life that morning!), lots of smiles and laughs for me (and some strangers), and a very pleased dog.

Once I was back at the house I rushed around getting ready to leave by 11 AM.  As the clock turned 11:00 on the dot I had my coat and shoes on and was (barely) heading out the door.  For anyone who doesn’t know true Finley DNA… running late is not an option.  Unfortunately for me I am partial Schaaf DNA which means running late is the norm, but when mixed with the Finley blood running behind causes me excessive internal angst and anxiety. On Christmas it was well worth it as the day with family was phenomenal.  My aunt pampered me by doing my nails, and  I was able to spend time with my grandparents who are an inspiration in aging, independence, quick witted humor, and sass.   

Due to an impending winter storm we decided to head home early Christmas evening.  Rain turning to freezing rain and then snow was expected overnight and, well, safety first.  We hadn’t made it quite an hour when we drove into a thick and disorienting fog.  The type of fog which causes you to not know where you are even if you happen to be on a road you think you know like the back of your hand.  Add in the fact the temp fluctuated between 31-33 degrees causing ice to form on the car and leading us to question the actual conditions of the roads and we found ourselves in a semi tense drive.  The three hour drive stretched to about a 3 3/4 hour drive, but we arrived safe and sound.  I walked in the house with my arms full of clothes, essentials, and Christmas loot to discover it was a bit chilly inside.  At first I thought it was the cool, damp air from the fog and wind leaving me feel chilled.  However, when I went to turn the furnace up I discovered my furnace had shut itself off, it was clearly not operating correctly, and it was 49 degrees in the house. 

By nature I am not ever signing up willingly to do anything productive or work oriented after 7 pm, and entirely refuse after 8 pm.  My natural body rhythms like to get rolling early in the day and have some down time before bed.  Situations such as having no heat in December in Nebraska at 9 pm defy your natural body rhythms.  I know how to check one thing on a furnace, the flame sensor.  If I’m being honest, while taking the front panel off the furnace I was uptight and annoyed at the situation.  I wasn’t overly confident in what I was doing but knew it couldn’t hurt to try cleaning the sensor to see if it would make any difference.  Low and behold 20 minutes later my furnace was put back together and running as normal!  Success!  Not just success with the furnace though, but success with Christmas.  Had all of this transpired a year prior I would have had an entirely different mindset.  I might not have forgiven myself for falling back to sleep because self-compassion is a new trait of mine.  I might not have been able to laugh at myself and smile at Kivah has she pulled my congested, struggling-to-breath self along in her delight to exhaust her energy.  I might have thought the entire day was ruined since I didn’t get to spend Christmas night at my parents as I had intended.  I might not have been able to appreciate a phone conversation with a close friend to help pass the additional time I spent in the car due to the impending weather.  I might not have even tried to fix the furnace and instead been stressed and upset about having to call a HVAC repairman over the holidays.  But not in 2018.  In 2018 I was so thankful to spend the time I did get with my loved ones.  I was grateful for the early return home as I made it back safely, before bad weather arrived, and before my pipes froze.  I was grateful for a peaceful and harmonious holiday with a family who loves, uplifts, and supports one another.  I was grateful for paying attention, learning new tricks, and changing my old belief which held that how things work is really complicated making it impossible for me to fix things on my own.

As I enter the time of year for reflection, goal/intention setting for the year to come, and acknowledging accomplishments and failures from the present year, the events of one single day reveal a great deal of maturity in many of my characteristics.  I also see the advantage to continue to learn new tasks even if you swear you won’t ever WANT to put it to good use someday.  Next on the list:  dry walling.  I hope you give yourself credit for all the growth, victories, and expansions you have had with your being this year!  Have a safe and Happy New Year! Thanks for stopping by!

Peace & Love,

Janessa

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