My last blog was an up-close and personal example of how as humans we can feel two opposing truths at the same time.
But what I didn’t share was the automatic response we have to not doing this, to think there is something wrong when we experience this, and to move away from the discomfort of the negative polarity truth in order to feel better in the positive polarity truth. (If you’re not sure what I mean by polarity, check out this blogpost.)
If there is just one three-letter word, aside from God, that’s changed my life, it’s “and”.
Seriously!
So much so, I saw an ampersand on my drive to Minnesota and had to stop to take a selfie with it. If you love a ridiculous selfie, you can check it out here.
Back to and. Not or.
Inclusive. Adding to. More. Both. Many.
Most humans navigate the highs and lows of life experiencing them separately. Alternating between the emotions the two experiences create. Finding the highs blissfully fun and the lows anything but.
Highs and lows don’t always happen at separate times so experiencing the responses separately is to reject or block some of the emotions you are feeling.
I used to do this often. Rather than holding two opposing truths, I would either be happy or sad but not both. I most often would be consumed by the sad that it would be impossible to feel happy until the sad event had passed.
Last year taught me how to hold two opposing truths at the same time and honor them both. It taught me how to experience pain and joy, heartache and happiness, tenderness and toughness, hurt and hope!
It isn’t for the faint of heart. It’s a skill and an art, and there is a physiological reason why the negative emotions feel heavier. Those negative emotions create a response in the physical body releasing hormones and neurotransmitters. Hormones and neurotransmitters have actual weight and thus we experience that weight in response to our emotions. You can read more about the scientific aspect of this physical response here.
Experiencing two opposing emotions is something I believe every single human is capable of doing as they master the art of being human. The richness it brings to life is unsuspectingly beautiful!
There are two little disciplines that have allowed me to develop this skill:
- Being willing to experience the uncomfortable emotions that come with the lows without numbing, resisting, or rejecting them. For me personally, this required me to stop telling myself ‘I shouldn’t feel this way’ or I don’t have time for this. I mean, how inconvenient it is to feel uncomfortable emotions! Those misperceptions quite honestly sucked and kept me in a loop of refusing to feel good things even when I was feeling not so good things. Which brings us to the second point.
- Not allowing the pain, hurt, and heartache to swallow up and kill the happiness, joy, and hope that is still present. It might not seem like the good stuff is still present because of the weight of the hormones that are released with the negatively polarized emotions, but rest assured they are indeed still there. When you’re feeling in doubt of being able to experience a positive emotion because of the heavier emotions you are feeling, give this tool a try. It’s awesome, effective, and free!
An interesting truth about being human is that as your tolerance for feeling the negative emotions expand, so does your ability to feel greater amounts of positive emotions.
Lean into your emotions and feelings and be grateful for them. All of them! It’s like stopping to smell the roses along the journey of life rather than racing to a destination missing the treasures along the way.
Fun fact: Did you know your emotions are not your feelings and your feelings aren’t your emotions? Because both are involved in the ability to hold two opposing truths at the same time, it’s worth mentioning.
And both have positive intentions for you, even when they don’t feel comfortable. Want to be able to process your emotions and feelings AND create more positive emotions and feelings in your body at any time…including when you’re going through the rough patches of life?
Join us in Stronger Together where the topic this month is of course emotions and feelings! We are activating your ability to navigate them, so you stay in your power rather than being swept away by an emotional tornado, and we’re releasing the old beliefs that create a disconnection from being able to identify and acknowledge your emotions and feelings prior to them intensifying to ’emotional tornado’ status! We’d love to see you there!
Peace & Love,
Janessa
P.S. I have three slots available for 1:1 coaching-healing to support you in mastering the art of being human! Email me at fiercelyradiantsoul@yahoo.com to snag a free 30 minute discovery call!